Bit of a downer...

So I've been sick ever since we got back from Texas and I've been doing nothing but laying in bed...which isn't always a good thing for me. As I was laying in bed today, I started thinking about the fact that Dom and I have been married for almost 5 years and we still don't have a kid. I'm really sad about that. For as long as I can remember, I always said that when I grew up I wanted to be a mom, it's the only thing I've wanted that has stayed constant...and here I am, 26, married for 5 yrs, and no kid. When Dom and I first got married, I always said that I wanted to wait 5 yrs before having kids, but I never really meant it. After our first year, I was ready to try without trying, we both wanted a baby. Then to be told that you can't have a baby, it's absolutely devastating. I know that we "can" have a baby, but not on our own and maybe not even both of ours biologically. There have been a bunch of people I know that have had babies recently or who are pregnant, and I'm truely happy for all of them, but at the same time, it's really hard for me because I feel like I deserve a kid just as much as anyone else. I guess that I feel like it's a hopeless situation and that whichever avenue we take (infertility or adoption), it will be a really long time before we can afford it and it's never a sure thing. I guess another thing that makes it so hard is that in the mormon religion, you are expected to get married and start having kids. I'm always asked when we are planning on having kids and it kills me. I've told everyone that we can't have kids, but they still ask. I'm just scared that Dom and I will never have the chance to be parents, and that is really sad because he'd make an amazing daddy. And what are we supposed to do with our entire lives if we don't have kids and grandkids? It just seems like a very lonely existance...

New Addition

So this past week on December 15th, my big sister gave birth to a beautiful baby girl names Kailee Frances Nydegger. She is a beautiful little girl who looks just like her daddy. I'm very excited for this new addition to the Loosli family, I'm just sad that I don't know when I will get to meet her for the first time.

It's been a while...

I really need to get better at updating this thing! So in the past month and a half, Dom and I went to Utah and helped Marina move to AZ, which I am way excited about! We've had a lot of fun hanging out! Marina came over for Thanksgiving and helped me cook dinner and then we went midnight shopping at The Disney Store and then we were off to Walmart...we got there about 1 AM and were there till about 6:15 AM. It was a crazy morning full of crazy people, but we did get almost all of our Christmas shopping done. I only have a few people to buy presents for. I got Dom's XBox and in return, he bought me the absolute BEST hair straightner ever! I love it!
So nothing much has changed on the house front, except that we still don't have a house. The bank is being really stupid and we are tired of waiting, so we have started looking at other houses. We have put an offer on another house that I like better. It's smaller, but it has a bigger backyead and it's closer to in then the one we already have an offer on. So now we are waiting on the two houses, and Dom wants me to go and look at houses again this Friday, but we'll see.
Desi is finally down here with Marina, and since I don't work on Friday's, I get to take her! I'm so excited to spend the day with her cause she is so much fun! We are gonna make some cute Christmas ornaments and then Friday night we are having a girls night at Marina's house. Saturday we are going to the Zoo with Dom and then Dom is gonna take Desi on a date while I go to Marina's Christmas Party with her. Then next weekend we have my Christmas Party at the Biltmore, which I'm way excited about cause they are always really good. Dom and I decided that we are going to stay at The Biltmore for the night as a treat for ourselves.
That's about all for now...I'm just crossing my fingers that we get a contract on a house before April 30th so that I can still get my baby money...but we will see what happens, just like always...